Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Sex and the City: The High School Years

Teen novels about Carrie Bradshaw to be released.

Carrie and Miranda sat at their usual table in the cafeteria noshing on Wednesday meatloaf and Jello surprise. They were discussing the latest in a series of lackluster dates. Snapping into a carrot, Carrie said, "You would think after dating the top two-thirds of the upperclassmen, we could have found someone that understood us. But no. It's like all they care about are video games and superheroes. I get it. You're a clan leader on Halo 3. When can we talk about something that matters? Like shoes?"

Miranda shook her head in mutual disgust. "I've been trying to get Peter to grow up a little bit. Maybe get some culture in his life. But could he stay awake for the senior production of Our Town? So embarrassing. All he cares about is soccer, like that's going to get him anywhere."

Charlotte sat down with her brown-bag sushi. "What are we talking about today girls?"

Miranda rolled her eyes. "The state of unrest in the Middle East and the Iron Curtain. What do we always talk about? Boys and how they define us. Speaking of which, we're going to Peter's soccer game after school. Wanna come?"

"Oh, I can't. Young Republicans meeting."

"But I need you guys there! I feel so awkward at those things."

"You'll have Carrie right?" Miranda nodded. "Besides, I think Langdon is going to ask me to prom today."

Carrie laughed. "I just don't know what you see in him. He's so straight-laced."

"That's exactly what I see in him! He's such a gentleman! And he's going to be president someday."

Miranda said, "I thought he was already president of the club."

Charlotte shook her head. "Oh no, he's going to be president of America. His dad went to Yale. He made a lot of friends there. Anyway, he's perfect and I don't care what you guys say, he can be very romantic. Where's Samantha? I thought she'd be here by now."

Just then Samantha entered the cafeteria. She made her way to the table in characteristic heels and a miniskirt. As she sat down, Carrie said, "Where've you been?"

"Oh, Mr. Johnson had something to tell me after biology. And let me tell you gals, he definitely knows his anatomy."

Charlotte dropped her chopsticks. "Samantha, he has a wife! And children! And he's a teacher! That is so illegal!"

Samantha grinned slyly. "Calm down dear, we can both keep a secret."

A thought crossed Carrie's mind. "Wait a minute Samantha. You're like 31. Why are you still in high school?"

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